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The owes of Astros' baseball woes rests with Selig

Patrick Hubbell
  • BY PATRICK HUBBELL
  • Originally published June 19, 2012 at 5:45 p.m., updated June 19, 2012 at 5:45 p.m.

This year marks an important anniversary for baseball fans in Houston. Half a century ago, major league baseball arrived in the Bayou City. That same year, New York City was cursed with the Mets. It seems like only yesterday my father drove me across town to the Eighth Wonder of the World to watch the Astros compete for next-to-last place in the standings against - guess who? - the Mets. In the years since, my beloved Astros have risen and fallen like the temperature in April. Our wildest dreams were fulfilled at last when they clinched the National League Pennant in 2005 to go to the World Series.

I'm not writing to recount the recent woes of the Astros. Baseball is a game of statistics, and their travails are well-documented. The purpose of this column is to document the woes of baseball under Bud Selig.

Selig has been the commissioner of baseball since 1998. During that time, interleague play was introduced. Two batters surpassed the lifetime home run record of Roger Maris under taint of steroid abuse. And another round of wild-card playoff games was introduced. At this rate, we'll be carving the Thanksgiving turkey in time for the World Series. Ten years ago, he ruinously allowed the All-Star Games to become a joke as players spent more time schmoozing than swinging, and added another layer of joke by declaring the extra-innings game a tie. A TIE?! There's no tying, let alone crying, in baseball!

Astros fans familiar with Dante's Inferno have a special place in mind for Selig to occupy.

During the World Series game, fans and team owner Drayton McLane wanted to keep the stadium roof closed, not because of inclement weather, but because they wanted the NOISE! Nothing like thousands of screaming fans' voices reverberating around a closed container to pump up the blood. Selig imperiously declared that the roof of the Astros stadium would be open.

Don't count on Selig to require players to wear the traditional knickers and take off the jewelry. He was too busy fretting over the Colt-45 uniforms. There was a hold-up, if you will, on whether or not to allow the Astros to wear the original jerseys of the 1962 team with the smoking gun with the name. He was afraid some fan might dispute a bad call by the umpire with violence. Try telling that to Judge Roy Hofheinz and the Harris County commissioners who held the ground-breaking ceremony for the Astrodome by shooting Colt .45s instead of holding shovels.

What's next? Former player and color commentator Jimmy Wynn, popularly known as the Toy Cannon, would have to get used to being called Fantastic Guy in Center Field.

If he wanted to make himself really useful, he should have questioned the wisdom of putting a flagpole in center field at Enron Field - no, Astros Field - no, Minute Maid field. Well, whatever they call it, someone be sure to let the outfielder know there's a flagpole on the field.

Next year, the Astros will move from the National League to the American League because Selig decided there was an imbalance. Why should it matter? Bah! You might as well try to figure out what makes Jerry Jones think he's a better coach than the ones he hires and fires on a regular basis.

Baseball owners often have promotional games to lure fans into the stadium. They give away shirts, pins, pennants and whatever else the marketing department comes up with. I have an idea that should be a hit with Astros fans with respect for baseball and its traditions.

There should be a "Bud Selig Bobble Head Night" with the head already smashed in for the first 100 fans - no, first 500 - wait, make that the first 750 - oh, just give one to EVERYBODY. Even if they don't want to see the game, I think attendance would go way up for that.

Patrick Hubbell lives in Victoria and is a Spanish teacher in the Victoria school district.